Bran: We didn't do anything fun. We didn't color or anything, all we did was practice a fire.
First day of Kindergarten '79
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Cameron: If you surround yourself with assholes then you're going to get shit on.
Cameron: Which one would you portifically take?
Haylan: Had an awesome Batman dream last night, minus the fact that I was Vicki Vale. Who the heck has a Batman dream where they are Vicki Vale? The dream gods are laughing.
Dallas: Fighting the unprovoked seems to be the national pass time.
Laurie: I want you to know that I love you so very much & I think you are a great & wonderful person...much like the wizard of oz if he wasn't a fraud.
Gene: Pirates are just Gypsies that stole a boat.
Bran: I feel almost as thought I’ve taken some weird medicine that’s made me lightheaded, dizzy and scatterbrained. Man, I wonder if this is what it feels like to be Kim, but she gets it 24/7.
Eric: That teacher might have been right...you might be the devil.
I can tell you that old battle axe wasn't right...how dare she call my little angel Satan.
Cameron: I'm bored & hungry. They don't mix very well. If I were any stupider I might eat you.
Haylan: I always want french fries. I have a problem. I have french frytis".
Haylan: That cat is like a seal on crutches trying to cook coffee with pinto beans.
Jimbob: I am drunker than skunk!
Laurie: There is a god after all...Too bad he’s going to rise up out of the ocean and eat us all.
Bran: I have to wash my hands because I smell like a retirement home gynecologist.
Dallas: Everybody say you can't hold it, I say yow.
'83 Almost 2. He wanted to hold the drink himself, but in a moving car, it didn't seem such a good idea to anyone else.
Cameron: I wonder what that costume armor would look like on a cat.
Cameron: We're just sitting here minding our own business and Jaredx's saying crazy stuff, just banging his tongue in his mouth.
Dallas: Society doesn't want to admit there are women that shit and masturbate, and some women do it at the same time, and those are the women I want to know.
Laurie: We should all handle stress like a dog. Pee on it and walk away.
Gene: All of the legendary stories that never happened in the past, no matter how fantastic, are bound to happen in the future.
Bran: Eric needs a nun hat and a yardstick.
Dian: Not drinking water is like not flushing the toilet. If you don't keep it cleaned out, all of a sudden you're shitting in a bag.
Cameron: I like cats cause they'll smell anything you put on your finger.
Haylan: I was holding on to this Jack O'Lantern, praying to the gods of Halloween for one more Halloween.