Haylan: Here I was, in here learning, and then you guys show up and make me laugh and now my lip is bleeding.
A fresh look through the quote file
Browse public quotes
Rediscover quotes people have chosen to make public.
558 quotes in this Browse library
Dallas: Protesting to change the system is like jerking off to have a baby. It ain't gonna happen on sentiment.
Laurie: I don't want to go to a nursing home in my old age...when I get old, I want the abuse to be dished out by my own family.
Bran: Ugh! My allergies are too bad today, I am considering pulling a Vinnie Van Gogh on my nose.
Bran: That’s why Hayden said it, with a big grin in his eye.
Laurie: We just crossed the border.
Sandy: Great. You are safely out of the country, so dump the body and come on back home.
Cameron: Sometimes I wonder how many Reese's minis I could eat if I didn't have to unwrap them individually.
Cameron: If I ever killed somebody, I wouldn't just walk away. I would take their wallet.
Haylan: You need to stop inhaling your food, we're not a good match for the Heimlich!
Haylan: I like chork pops.
About 1.5-1.75 years old.
Dallas: Shut up! Y'all don't have to repeat everything just because you know the words.
Gene: Mormonism would be the funniest religion, if there was no scientology.
Bran: Games are for playing, not marrying.
Eric: I'm glad you're alive so you can pretend to be dead.
Cameron: I think Lost made me not nervous about flying because if we go down I'm going to be thinking 'magicalisland magicalisland magicalisland'.
Haylan: I was sitting around thinking about owls and I've had a Harry Potter revelation! It has nothing to do with owls, though.
Haylan: If the sound of silence is a ceiling fan to you, you've been living in suburbia too fucking long.
Dallas: I was dragged into this weird fetish shop with Roxc cos she got a half day. I made the mistake of wearing my leather jacket and motorcycle boots and this funny hat but in this place it makes me look like a gay leather-daddy.
Laurie: I have determined, from looking at myself sideways in the mirror as I run past on my way out of the bathroom, that I look somewhat like a bowling ball with little skinny legs.
Like the ball in the Strolling Bowling game in the 80s. Branden had one.
Bran: Ida Know's my best friend. She drinks my milk, coughs on my dinner and eats my blanket.
He was 4 years old.
Bran: Buy a dildo, bitch. They don’t argue.
To a woman driving past who was fighting with her boyfriend/husband.
Eric: He had grey hair in the 80s....and that was 20 years ago.
Eric: It was easier to get jesus to raise from the dead than it was to wake me up in the morning
Cameron: I like it when you get your butt really hot and you sit down and it burns your ass.
Haylan: Your confidence in me is startling. And completely misled.
No, it isn't.