Norah: Look and watch.
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Cameron: Only Gene could find a way to make a salad bad for you.
Haylan: Now I'm not as sleepy because I got excited about napping.
Haylan: How? How does this happen? What kind of huge fucking cougar do we have in here?
Dallas: Wait. Everybody's talking to me at once, and I have a small brain.
Laurie: One of these days, being stupid might not be as great as you think it is.
Laurie: Beggars can't be choosers.
Bran: It depends on how white they are.
Dallas: I don't know what I want but I don't want whatever y'all want me to have.
1987.
Cameron: Life is all about finding places you're comfortable to fart in.
Cameron: He only bloodied one forehead, but it was the only forehead he had.
Haylan: Right as I try to tickle you and start to feel better, you go and shit your pants.
Dallas: Carnival justice is quick and often wrong.
Dallas: Sometimes Spiderman swings by his peanut, that's what happens when Wonder Woman messes with him.
4 years old.
Gene: It’s like looking down the hole of an outhouse and picking out the best turd.
Looking at a list of republican candidates.
Bran: Just because you are good at swimming, does not mean that there are not sharks in the water.
Gene: I'll go with you. There are plenty of people out there who look as bad as I do.
Looking at the gathering of hillbillies at my cousin James' graveside service.
Cameron: Why don't you just have a can of shit, like everyone else?
Haylan: Science is stronger than religion and that's why people get pregnant.
Haylan: It's not perfume, it's that smelly good stuff.
Dallas: Nope, you're too old. You smell too bad. You're almost a dog.
Po'Nard.
Laurie: I used some of those dastardly wax strips on my legs and pits because I keep getting ingrown hairs. Those things are really implements of torture and if they’re not illegal under the Geneva Convention, they should be.
Bran: The only thing stopping us is our own vile laziness.
Dallas: Baby Haylan my little daughter, too.
1984
Cameron: I thought I was a narcissist. Then I saw people on Instagram..
Cameron: Yeah, and life is hard. 01.16.95.
Yeah, don't tell him how old he is...