Bran: Joanne is mean to animals and the elderly, so Tom is like her one stop shopping.
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Bran: I just dreamed I was fist fighting three dozen lions in the middle of a prairie fire over 21 corn dogs and a pimp hat. I was, by god, winning, too.
Cameron: This is my special move, FAGGOT SMASH!!
Cameron showed Branden a special move after playing Street Fighter. I don't think he was too happy.
Haylan: That's not the first time I've thrown dead birds, well, it is the first time I've worn gloves.
Haylan: We made little art.
Unhappy about the amount of art class at school.
Dallas: I surely did not mean to. I will shoot him in his sweets.
Laurie: Who put Pinocchiover there?
Bran: Thanks for the tupens, whitey. I'll swim back to Hibernia.
Haylan: What did she say when you told her?
Eric: Her gasts were flabbered.
Brigid: Mommy, one day I'm going to be so good I blow your head off.
Cameron: Jared, do you ever lick your cry? Sometimes I lick my cry . It tastes like a different kind of water.
Haylan: Nnnnoooooo why do you get all buffets? I get no buffets. I'll just eat my sad soup and cry into it instead of adding a can of water.
Dallas: It's wonky AND it's wacky. It's a fucking chocolate factory.
Laurie: These people are willfully uninformed and maliciously ignorant.
Gene: He looks like an overgrown retard. That’s probably not the last time we’ll see him on the news.
Bran: I just can’t adapt myself to the damned fool common-man thinking.
Norah: They're not handcuffs. They're best friend chains.
Cameron: Just put beer drinking as his dominant feature.
Guess who?
Haylan: Oh, no, I just put my foot in the hot dog. That's how you know I'm white trash.
Haylan: I don't want to give massages when I grow up. Some big fat guy will say, you got nice hands, baby, come over here and gimme a French kiss.
Dallas: I was talking before you were born and I’m not done yet.
Laurie: Yep, she’s got one foot in the grave and the other is clubbin’ Crud.
Nard. Nardo. Leondardo. Monica Francis Leonardo. The Mama of every cat on this place.
Bran: I plead 3rd party status. I am a nonhuman entity who would like to see nothing better than either: The complete cooperation of mankind, OR the complete destruction of mankind. Preferably all at once (with either option).
Eric: Like having the comfort of a weighted blanket with the benefits of acupuncture.
Sounds like a cat, eh?
Cameron: Wild squirtles don't come with sunglasses